Lessons
by Kracken l.w
Summary: Bulma is frustrated with her inability to get Vegeta to stop being a jerk. So she asks Chi-chi for help in getting through to him.
1. Default Chapter

Lessons

Lesson #1

_Disclaimer:  I do not own DBZ, etc., etc., so on and so forth; don't sue people, it truly isn't worth it._

It was another boring day at Capsule corp. The gravity room was busted again and he had nothing to do but lie on the couch and watch that idiot, Hercule, beat up his fellow incompetents. He was just amusing himself by picturing that posturing pansy in a _real_ fight when a large stainless steel frying pan descended on the top of his head.  He sat straight up in surprise and was about to demand an explanation when he heard a familiar voice say  "Very good, Bulma, but next time I want to see a liitle more action in the wrist. You haven't quite got the hang of that last little flick that gives it the necessary force." 

**"Thank you Chi chi."**

Crazy women. He sank down on the couch until only the tip of his hair was visible, and pretended they didn't exist.


	2. Lesson 2

Lesson # 2 By kraken 

            Vegita lay on the couch, bored, frustrated with the inactivity. He couldn't go to the gravity room to train, it was destroyed again. (Possibly due to a red crayon a certain someone had been using to try and pick the lock . . . before he lost it in the inner workings.) There was no one he felt was powerful enough to give him a good workout free to spar, either. He certainly wasn't going to do the house maintenance his wife occupied herself with. That would be too demeaning for a male of his power and lineage.

He idly picked up the T.V. remote and began channel surfing.

            He'd been at it for a while (half an hour, give or take a few.) when his wife leaned over the back of the couch with that sweet, reasonable face that meant she wanted him to do something he wasn't going to like. "No." Was all he said. "Vegita, I really don't ask all that much of you, you know." "No." Stubborn man. "Will your royal highness do me a favor and go mow the lawn so his hardworking, undervalued wife can let his son out to play!" he just stared at the TV. screen. "Oh, well, I tried being nice, I tried being mean. Let's see what our other options are. Chichi said there were always at least three. Now what was the other one again?". Vegita ignored her as she wandered off into the house, still babbling quietly to herself.

 He had just settled down for a nap when the couch suddenly heaved over towards the television. "What!" He craned his head around trying to see what was going on; but just at that moment the couch gave two more heaves. The third tipped it up enough that he slid off it and landed in a stunned heap on the floor. 

Just in time to see his wife retrieve the car jack from under the couch and saunter off towards the tool room. "Mow the lawn." It was not a request. Most days he would have refused, but he kept seeing that evil little smile on her face as she left the room.

He went out to mow the lawn. 

^----^ Am I evil or not? Poor, poor Veggie I think that if I do another one of these, I'll let you people decide what the lesson should be, 'kay? Buh-bye now!

_Oh yeah, and I don't own DBZ or any of the characters thereof._


	3. Lesson3

**Lesson 3.**

_By Kracken L.W._

Disclaimer: The only thing in this fic that I own is the insanity that inspired it.

This one goes out to Bishojo-Battousai. Who kinda suggested it.  "  = speaking, ' = thoughts.

            'Why me. Why does it always have to be me?' the thought had crossed his mind more than once today. First she had caught him staring in shock and admiration at a fashion show on TV. The current model was wearing a short tunic/dress type thing made entirely of fine gold chains strung vertically from one around her neck to one that hanging just around the upper thigh. It didn't leave much to the imagination. ( A/N: The version my brother ran across while channel surfing left even less.)

" Vegita!" he winced inwardly. He knew that tone of voice only too well. 

3 hours later & a phone consultation with Chi-Chi:

            "Now, if you've learned your lesson, by the end of this show you'll have ignored **every last one of those** models. If you haven't …." She gave him a truly wicked smirk. "You'll be sleeping on the couch… for a month." His eyes widened. She couldn't **do** this to him!  He must have spoken aloud, because she leaned against him and purred "Oh yes, yes I can!" and settled into her seat to keep a close eye on her husband. Dende help him, he didn't know if he could do this. The evil woman just had to pick a fashion show for women's lingerie. . .

**END**


End file.
